Picky Eater

Big Brother is going to take his prom date to "Granola Bar Hut" for dinner. (Or, at least that's my worst fear.)

I admit it. Big Brother got the picky eater gene from Busy-Dad-E. Whether it's a case of immature taste buds or yet another way for a 4 year-old to be the master of his environment, Big Brother is my "Mini-Me" when it comes to eating. They say that you can "grow a child" on anything, and I think they're right.

Let me first confess (a few of) the sins of the father, as some background.
1. When I was a kid, I would only eat the mini Lender's bagels. If they were the full, adult-sized ones, I refused.
2. Foods were not allowed to touch each other, and were eaten in sequence (e.g., I'd eat all of my sandwich, then all of my chips, etc.) I'm still guilty of this one.
The next few things I did not eat until my early 20's (and now love)
3. Milk on my cereal.
4. Pudding.
5. Pasta with sauce (would only eat the noodles plain with a little salt and pepper)
6. Cooked vegetables (but I'd eat tons of raw vegetables).
7. Soup (I promised my grandma I'd try her vegetable soup by age 5, which never happened)
8. Salsa
9. Any toppings on a sandwich outside of meat and bread
10. Casseroles

Okay, you get the idea.

Although Big Brother doesn't eat much "junk food", such as chips or dessert, he is pretty limited in his food choices. No meat. No green vegetables. No sandwiches. No pizza. No chicken fingers. C'mon, some kids only eat chicken fingers?!?

Let me give you a sample menu from Chez Big Bro
Breakfast:
-Le juice de chocolat (made from the finest cows, with a splash of chocolate soy milk)
-Your choice of:
--Belgian waffle (Eggo style, with High School Musical logo--and it HAS to be High School Musical (see Dad-E's sin #1 above).
God help us if that show ever goes out of style)
--Breafast pastry with icing (your choice of a fruit or brown sugar-cinnamon filled tart)
--Chia (aka cereal). Milk costs $1,000,000 extra

Lunch:
-Le juice de chocolat
-Cracker style fish (Whole grain, cheddar flavored. Note this product does not contain any actual fish)
-Bar du granola (Nutra Grain, you choice of fruit filling)
-Yogurt (your choice of Trix the Bunny or Sully from Monster's Inc.)
-Apple (just like the ones from the Wicked Stepmother's basket, hold the poison)

Dinner:
-Le juice de chocolat
-Les tots du tator. Ketchup also $1,000,000 extra
-Bar du granola
-Juice de yogurt (Danimals, your choice of red or purple)
-Strawberries

Evening Snack:
-Multivitamin with Iron

Even Big Brother's behavior/answers (aka excuses) when it comes to eating must've be genetically determined as well.
1. "I don't like that, it's yucky." he says. "But you've never tried that," we reply. His usual counter-replies are "Yes I have" or "What's it yucky for?"
2. "I'll eat a sandwich when I'm 4." he said. Now that he's 4, he says, "I'll eat a sandwich when I'm a daddy."
3. Even if it's something he doesn't want, if you try to take the food away he'll scream that he wants it. His record for keeping something on the table this way is 2 days (okay, not really, but you still chuckled).
4. Big Brother is the master of trying something new one time, LOVING it, and then refusing to eat it again. Peanut butter and carrots (not together, but as separate items), are prime examples. I even have him on videotape eating carrots and saying that he loves them. We might as well burn the tape.
5. If something is made that is "deceptively delicious" (e.g., brownies with broccoli in them), he is NOT deceived and won't eat it.
6. Anything that is dessert, that does not meet criteria 5 above, he will eat.

The redemption is that I probably doubled or tripled the number of foods I ate (and the way they were prepared) in the first year Busy-Mom-E and I were married. Thank goodness for her patience. She made subtle suggestions and slowly gained my confidence. "If you like A, I promise you'll like B," she'd say, and she'd be right. It snowballed from there. I hope Big Brother marries a woman one day who is that good.

And so, we hold out hope for Big Brother. He's tried a few new things here and there. We continue to offer him a small amount of our meal (on his own plate), which he promptly refuses. The "cooker thing" (aka play kitchen) has helped his tolerance of having things like meat, rice, and vegetables within a half-mile of his plate. We ignore the screams, and will keep offering. I've tried to tell him that Dad-E waited too long to try these things, and he regretted it, but so far it's fallen on deaf ears.

Gotta run. Can I get my granola bar to go?

Cheers,
Busy-Dad-E

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