Parenting With Pop Tarts

If there’s a “picky eater gene”, it’s definitely dominantly inherited because I’ve passed it on to both boys.

The silver-lining is that with the help of the right woman, it’s possible to overcome the “picky eater gene”, even to the point of no longer being classified as a picky eater (thanks, Busy-Mom-E.)

In the mean time, Mom-E and I still have about 18-22 years of picky eating around the house.

Please note, this doesn’t mean an absence of trying to work on the “problem.” We continue to try to put a small amount of “new” foods on the boys’ plates at mealtimes.

This usually results in screams of protest to “take that away”, if not outright refusal to sit at the table. Still, we gingerly attempt to offer new foods.

Some parents would say, “Just let your kid go hungry. Eventually they’ll eat.”

If that were a viable option, then we’d consider it. However, in addition to the “picky eater gene”, the boys also inherited two copies of the “stubborn, type A personality gene.”

This means that before they would eat something in the category of “green” or “meat” or “new”, they would prefer to either:
1. Pass out from hunger.
2. Become unbelievably irritable and hyperactive secondary to hypoglycemia.

I’m going to give you a recipe now:
Combine
2 Picky Eaters, plus
1 Trip far away from home,
“Bake” for a few days, and you get
EVEN PICKIER EATERS.

This summed up a portion of our recent trip to California.
You see, sometimes picky eaters become even pickier when they’re out of their surroundings (perhaps an attempt to gain more control over a foreign environment?)

We already knew that getting the boys to eat would be challenging, so early in the trip, we made the most of our downtown situation. We found a store and stocked up on as many of their favorites as possible.

The only problem was that we missed the memo that many of these things were off the preferred foods list.

Finally, several days into the trip, with the boys starting to get a little on the cranky, fussy, “stop playing with the light switchy”, “stop hitting your brothery”, “don’t jump on the bed while I’m trying to brush your teethy” from mild undernutrition, I broke down.

I bought a box of Pop Tarts. We don’t usually give the boys Pop Tarts, but it’s one “food” I knew they were highly unlikely to refuse.

And the clouds parted and the sun shone down upon us.

Big Brother ate two in a single sitting, and even Little Brother ate one.

You could almost feel the tension leave the hotel room.

It was amazing. Children with full bellies are amazing.

We became (quite a bit) more pleasant and cooperative, and even occasionally listened to directions (following them was another story).

I wouldn’t go so far as to say that Pop Tarts saved our vacation, but they definitely helped.

I also wouldn’t go so far as to say that Pop Tarts are more effective at parenting our boys than either Mom-E or I, but they definitely helped.

IN SUMMARY: If they ever made a Batman-like “utility belt” for dads/parents, there should definitely be a holster for Pop Tarts.

What else would you have on your dad/parent “utility belt”? I’d love to hear from you.

See you on Fatherhood Friday,
Busy-Dad-E