Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Christmas Eve Church 500

So I know that Christmas was "ages ago", but this is a funny story I wanted to be sure to write about.

One of the challenges about going to church on Christmas Eve, especially with young kids, is that you have to get there about 5 hours beforehand in order to secure seats, otherwise you're trapped by a sea of hats, coats, programs, and annoying people who say, "Sorry, that seat is saved."

Not unless it's got yo name on it

Which pretty much guarantees that regardless of start time, it's going to "conflict" with at least one child's nap/sleep schedule, or children will have to sit through a long service without a nap.

The voices in my head are saying, "Heads I win, tails you lose."

Such was our predicament again this year.

And because nature loves irony, we couldn't get Bab-E Brother to go down for his nap until about 30 minutes before we needed to leave.

The other voice in my head is saying something about, "Never wake a sleeping Bab-E."

So we opted for "Plan B", which was Mom-E goes to church by herself first and morphs into one of the "annoying seat-saving people", and Dad-E lets Bab-E Brother sleep until the very last minute, and then brings all 3 boys.

Actually, this part worked out better than expected. Bab-E Brother did much better with an hour versus a 7 minute nap. The boys cooperated (maybe that had to do with the fact that I loaded up a bag with fruit snacks, granola bars, and goldfish for each of them), and we left more or less on time.

When we were just a few miles from church, Mom-E called to tell me that they made an announcement to the effect of, "Move inward away from the aisles. If the people you're saving seats for don't show up soon, you're about to lose them."

Mild panic attack over the thought of standing for 2 hours with the boys.

"Don't worry, Mom-E, we'll be there in 3 minutes."

I explained the predicament to the boys, and I needed them to get out of the minivan quickly when we parked.

We're traveling down a 2 lane road (at the speed limit). The car in front of us is going to make a left turn, at which point there is also an extra turn lane to the right that goes into a residential neighborhood.

As there was no other traffic, I did a "dinky" and passed the car ahead of me by going around him on the right, so I didn't have to slow down.

At which point, Little Brother casually asks me, "Dad-E, are you going to drive like a maniac now?"

Thanks for the vote of confidence, little buddy.

See you on Fatherhood Friday,

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